Ha ha! Spot the sad Dr Who references...
(Article by Michael Holden)
By a mainline station there is an old police call post, nothing more than a thin blue pillar that must once have held a telephone and fitted with a sign confirming it’s dereliction advising those in need of help to look elsewhere. Any resemblance to its celebrated relative in Dr Who is negligible, but on a match day afternoon I watched it beguile two tipsy fans as they tried to make their way home.
Fan 1 (quite fat, clearly the leader) “Where the fuck are we?”
Fan 2 (smaller, younger, confused by disposition as much as alcohol) “Station innit?”
Fan 1 (seeing the police post) “Whassat about?”
Fan 2 Eh?
Fan 1 (getting excited) “It’s the whatsit, it’s the TARDIS!”
Fan 2 “Eh?”
Fan 1 (really happy now) “The TARDIS!”
Fan 2 (looking a bit annoyed) “That ain’t the TARDIS…it’s just a thing.”
Fan 1 (seeing two policemen approaching in the distance) “Go ask them coppers where we are.”
Fan 2 (moving off) “Right”
Fan 1 (calling after him) “Ask them if this is a TARDIS!”
The younger man ran up to the police, talked to them and then ran back.
Fan 1 “Is it the TARDIS?”
Fan 2 (defiant) “I never asked ‘em about that.”
Fan 1 (seeing the police coming closer) “I’ll ask ‘em myself.”
But as they arrived he noticed they were heavily armed and as though the alcohol afforded him a vision of an all too feasible future where pratting about is a capitol crime, he elected to say nothing at all.
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