Top Quality Nonsense!

Steve May - purveyor of TOP QUALITY NONSENSE™ at your service for all your illustrative & animation needs! You can see more work here & here & for animation go here

Draw the Coronavirus

Here's my three attempts at cartoonist Martin Rowson's Draw The Coronavirus competition on Twitter to in conjunction with #MuseumFromHome to support the amazing

Cartoon Museum in London - you can donate here

St George's Day (behind the scenes)

Here's a little behind the scenes clip from my St George's Day picture of George & the Dragon enjoying a nice cuppa & a Jammie Dodger™

Happy Saint George's Day!

On St Georges Day we celebrate the thoroughly English knight Saint George who did the proper English thing & had a nice chat & an English cuppa & a Jammie Dodger™ with the dragon. (before biffing him when he wasn't looking & nicking his biscuits!)

* NB 'Biffing', for ALL of you home schooling right now is actual Old English for 'hitting a reptile with a blunt object' deriving from the Anglo Saxon 'byffinge'

(not to be confused with 'byffing ye worme' which is an Anglo Saxon euphemism for self-abuse!)

The Bookmark project

Here's this years offering for Sharon Hattersley's Bookmark Project which runs every year to raise as much money as possible for Katiyo Primary School in Zimbabwe! This year I thought 'Who doesn't LOVE an acrobatic farting dacshshund?'

National Tea Day

Of course on #National Tea Day the ONLY question being asked is which is the best dunking biscuit?*

*obviously a jammy dodger is a stupid choice but what do you expect from a cat?

(Anyway, what's a cat doing drinking a cup of tea you FREAKS?!?!) 

New Viking series with Francesca Simon!

I'm very excited to announce that I'll be teaming up with best-selling 'Horrid Henry' author Francesca Simon for a new series for Faber & Faber which "features a marauding band of terrible Vikings, led by terror twins Hack and Whack, who are adored by their parents for being the worst Vikings in the village" 

I'm very excited to be working with Francesca, I've already caught myself laughing out loud at the text which is ALWAYS the best sign and I'm relishing the chance of bringing Hack and Whack's terrible exploits to life. (Getting to draw a baby wolf called Bitey Bitey is also a magnificent bonus too!)

Here's a link the the article at The Bookseller

Pancake Day!

On #shrovetuesday do you EVER think about pancakes with vertigo? No - because it’s ALL about you isn’t it?!?

Publication Day for Anna Gain & The Same Sixty Seconds!

Anna Gain & The Same Sixty Seconds by Guy Bass & illustrated by me is our 4th collaboration for Barrington Stoke & is published today! 

There's time travel, chaos (& the occasional dog's bum - what MORE can you want?!?)

"Ever-punctual Anna Gain is never late, and she's certainly never late for the school bus. Every day she catches it in perfect time. But not today. After a series of absurd events cause Anna to miss the bus, she's transported one minute back in time - only to be stuck re-living the same sixty seconds again ... and again ... and again ... Is fate trying to teach Anna a lesson? And will she ever escape? A laugh-out-loud and punny take on 'Groundhog Day' from a top-notch author-illustrator pairing, particularly suitable for struggling, reluctant or dyslexic readers aged 8+"

Krampus says...

Krampus is a mythological creature or demon, particular to parts of eastern and northern Europe, especially Austria and Hungary. It is believed that Krampus accompanies Saint Nicholas during the Christmas season, warning and punishing bad children (in contrast to St. Nick, who gives gifts to good children). Due to German and Austrian influence, the myth of Krampus is also prevalent in Croatia, (Czecho)Slovakia, Slovenia and northern Italy.

The word Krampus originates from the Old High German word for claw (Krampen). Traditionally, young men dress up as the Krampus in the first two weeks of December, particularly on the evening of 5 December (St Nicholas' Eve, known in German as 'Krampusnacht'), and roam the streets frightening children and women with rusty chains and bells. In some rural areas the tradition also includes birching - corporal punishment with a birch rod – by Krampus, especially of young girls.

Images of Krampus usually show him with a basket on his back used to carry away bad children and dump them into the pits of Hell. 

Merry Christmas everyone!

Yule Cat says "BÖO!"

Jólakötturin, the Icelandic Yule Cat is 'a vicious cat who lurks about the snowy countryside during Christmas time and eats people who have not received any new clothes to wear before Christmas Eve.'(!)

Praying you ALL get new socks this year!

The Knückle Crüshers

Celebrating Halloween & the 'unnëcessary hëavy mëtal ümlaut'!


(from an idea by Rachel Delahay Lefever)

Diana Ditch (Boris Johnson's drag name)

(from an original tweet by Mark Gatiss)

Matt Millz On Tour by Harry Hill - published today!

Matt Millz on Tour! the 3rd in the hilarious series by Harry Hill & illustrated by me is out today  (Thursday October 17th) published by Faber & Faber This time Matt is taking his act to the Edinburgh Festival! You can order it here!

Matt’s dream of becoming a stand-up comic is fading. Six months on from his success at the Apollo, the gigs have dried up, and it’s back to the daily drudge of schoolwork for Matt and his pals. But then his twelve-year-old manager Kitty has a brainwave: if they can persuade their teachers to take a school play up to the Edinburgh Festival, they could hold a comedy night too.

But Matt’s got a rival new school-mate Jamie who is pushing to be in the comedy line-up. And Jamie is good. But is he too good to be true?

National Poetry Day - Holes - Spike Milligan

Tigers on Vaseline!

Moving on from my previous post for International Tiger Day here's another tiger on vaseline thanks to inspiration from the great Dame David Bowie!

Hang on to yourself!

You want more book covers for non existent (as yet) books? Go here!

International Tiger Day - hang on to yourself...

...here's a tiger on vaseline*




(*psst all you non Bowie-files, it's a line from Hang On To Yourself from the Aladdin Sane album)

Spinning Cat

Whichever way the cat's bum points...

A Bestiary of (dimly remembered) Literary Terms

I was following a thread by @katemond on Twitter about 7 year olds being forced to learn about 'fronted adverbials' at school & after looking the term up realised the reality was a hell of a lot duller than my original idea of what a Fronted Adverbial looked like.

I proceeded to draw some more dimly remembered terms from studying English literature back in the mists of time.

Badum-Tsh!

Does anybody know any good jokes? I have JUST the animation for you!

Remember...wear sunscreen!

Hotdog!

The Unlucky Eleven - publication day!

The Unlucky Eleven which is published today is my second collaboration with author Phil Earle for Barrington Stoke as part of their Little Gems series.
I really enjoyed illustrating this funny action packed story about a rather shambolic & comical football team with a supposedly cursed football kit! It's a very nicely produced & designed book & you can either by it online or even better head down to your nearest independent bookshop & ask for it.
"The action flows, both on the pitch and in the dressing room, and the story feels as real and authentic as a pair of muddy football boots. Steve May’s illustrations are bang on...A winner!"

(Andrea Reece)

The Haunted Tie (& other stories)

Excerpt from a series of horror stories I will never probably get around to writing...

Mëtal Kittën (slight return)

More röck animals! (incorporating the ubiquitous 'Mëtal Ümlaut'™)

Collect the set!

Bookmark Project 2019

I was happy to take part in this year's Bookmark Project & draw an avidly reading tiger. The Project helps to raise money for the children who attend the Katiyo Primary School in Zimbabwe you can read more here

Sir Henry Rawlinson...

A fine quote from an eminently quotable movie 'Sir Henry At Rawlinsons End' written by the late great ginger geezer himself Viv Stanshall.

Don't Shout At The Lions Lionel!

Never raise your voice at big cats. This is unnecessary & invariably rather dangerous. Another in the series of 'books I haven't quite written yet'

Jubilant pink cat on postcard (with coffee stain)

Pigs & monkeys!

All sorts of flying gubbins...

Spring Equinox!

Yesterday was the first day of spring so I figured I'd dust the old codpiece out...

Cärrot Dëth

More animal adventures in the world of the 'extraneous mëtal umlaut'™

World Sleep Day

Mëtal Chicken!

More forays into the world of the 'extraneous mëtal umlaut'™ genre.

If you enjoyed this post, why not try Mëtal Kitten & complete the set?

Mëtal Kitten!

More adventures for the 'extraneous heavy metal umlaut'™

All images available to buy as prints at my Ko Fi Shop

World Book Day 2019

Happy World Book Day 2019 !
(but spare a thought for some of the less popular days too World Cook Day, World Rook Day, World Crook Day) 

Spread the love & happy reading!

RIP Keith Flint

Incredibly sad news about the passing of Keith Flint from the Prodigy today so I drew a little Keith inspired doodle