Saturday, 25 September 2010
The Guardian - Michael Holden's All Ears 25th September
as they say...It's all done with computers these days, I just press a button then f*** off for a massage & a cocktail usually...
(Article by Michael Holden)
It was All Ears' good fortune to be in New York last week, feeding bread into a rotary toaster at a breakfast buffet, when two young lions of the leisure industry – all shirts and laptops – joined the queue behind me.
Man 1 (clearly in awe of his subject) "We have quarterly meetings, and he's nothing but questions."
Man 2 (of the same opinion) "That's why these guys are who they are. He was an account manager at Morgan Stanley. They see things we don't see."
Man 1 "He's way down in the weeds. We were meeting and he starts asking how the chambermaids know when the room is checked out."
Man 2 "Shit!"
Man 1 "That's what I'm talking about. He doesn't have to worry about that."
Man 2 "But he does!"
Man 1 "Exactly. These guys are spinning stuff around and we don't even feel the motion."
Man 2 (rightly puzzled) What do you mean?"
Man 1 "They're way out there."
Man 2 (like that helped) "Right."
Man 1 "You can't learn that shit. It's instinctive."
Man 2 "The success instinct."
Man 1 "Damn right."
Man 2 "So what did you say?"
Man 2 "About the chambermaids."
Man 1 "Oh right. Well how the fuck would I know? I said I'd get back to him."
Man 2 "So how do they know?"
Man 1 "I don't know. I haven't asked yet."
Man 2 "Don't they just knock on the door, or phone the desk?"
Man 1 "No. I'm guessing there's computers involved."