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Saturday 30 October 2010

The Guardian - Michael Holden's All Ears 30th October


On reflection would have liked to have added a penguin into the mix,
I like penguins. End of.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2010/oct/30/michael-holden-all-ears
(article by Michael Holden)
By giving us what we thought we wanted whenever we wanted it, supermarkets have bred a reciprocal brand of super anxiety. Listen closely, and the aisles hum with a discontent peculiar to the resentment of dreams fulfilled. Down by the fresh meat fridges, I found two men bemoaning the very air that they breathed.

Man 1 (sifting through the giblets) "It's cold in here."

Man 2 "Colder than it used to be?"

Man 1 "For sure. You come in here in summer with a T-shirt on and you have to run round, get out before your core temperature plummets down."

Man 2 (pulling at his ears) "I can feel it in my ears. My ears are cold. That never used to happen."

Man 1 "It's just daft. Think about the energy."

Man 2 "It's unpleasant, is what it is. Maybe it's to keep you moving. Get you in and get you out. Like the fucking Crystal Maze.

Man 1 "On ice."

Man 2 "Exactly!"

Man 1 "It's gotta be a preservation thing. They fly this stuff in from wherever the fuck – Argentina – everybody hates that. So they have to keep it as long as possible, drop the temperature of the whole store."

Man 2 "That can't be good."

Man 1 "It's like I said: the energy."

Man 2 (grabbing a lump of meat and reckoning its heft as though he might use it as a weapon) "It all comes down to energy."

Man 1 "We should go somewhere else."

Man 2 (holding the joint at eye level and staring directly at it, Hamlet-style) "There isn't anywhere else though, is there?"

Man 1 "Not that I know of. Not round here."

Thursday 28 October 2010

A hat made of noise

The hat with fury inside



From a small ads mis-print, think it was supposed to read 'furry'- perils of sloppy spelling kids!

Wednesday 27 October 2010

Bat skint


Our hero faces up to the reality of budget shopping...

(drawn during a spectacularly pointless meeting with my bank)

Decisions, decisions...


We've all been afflicted by the eternal 'which nose' conundrum haven't we?

Oh...just me then.

Tuesday 26 October 2010

Atomic Kitten


Yep! Just that. Move along, nothing to see here

Saturday 23 October 2010

Funnel Cat



The funnel of shame : (