Saturday, 14 August 2010
This week's illustration gives you a priviledged window into my own grooming methods(ish)
(I'm sure there was also a a 'gentleman's pornographic pamphlet' entitled 'Shaven Havens' but I might have just made that up - no prizes for guessing the content!)
(article by Michael Holden)
I don't know whether the regulars in the library have started using aftershave or are just drinking it. Either way, in warm weather this new-found aroma can make it tough to share a table with them. With a prevailing wind though, anything's possible, and the other day I heard this confession of idle folly.
Man 1 (staring at an magazine advert) "I shaved off all my body hair."
Man 2 (not especially surprised) "When was this?"
Man 1 "Few years back. Seemed like a good move."
Man 2 "Was it?"
Man 1 "Not really. It was something to do though. Watching it grow back. It kept me out of trouble."
Man 2 "I hear that."
Man 1 "They just give you the one razor, and they toss it away after. I just thought, go for it, you know. Seize the moment."
Man 2 "Did anyone complain?"
Man 1 "No, they just sort of looked at me. Of all the things you can do with a razor … well, they see worse, I reckon."
Man 2 "Did you cut yourself at all?"
Man 1 "No, I stayed with the grain. You know, the way the hair's growing. It was tough around the knees. I remember that."
Man 2 "How did it feel?"
Man 1 "For a while it felt good. Really clean, like brand new. Then it was like a big rash, and then, you know, a ton of stubble. All itchy and messed up. My skin's an issue at the best of times."
Man 2 "Would you do it again?"
Man 1 "No. Not unless someone asked me too. And there'd have to be a reason."
Man 2 "A lesson learned, then."
Man 1 "Absolutely. Very much so"